Manipulative Persuasion

Background

Manipulators—con (confidence) men, fraudsters, cult leaders, corrupt politicians, and some charismatic religious leaders—excel at persuading others. While many of their methods are unethical and unacceptable, some techniques they use can be applied by those who want to excel at ethical persuasion.

This page describes these acceptable methods.

It is intended for people who want to excel at ethical persuasion, specifically in the context of encouraging others to act wisely and in ways that serve their own best interests.

Definitions

Persuasion

The process of getting others to believe something or do something that the persuader wants.

Ethical Persuasion

Persuasion that meets both of the following criteria:

  1. It aligns with the best interests of the target.

  2. It avoids unacceptable methods, such as

    1. Use of incorrect information.
    2. Use of biased information.
    3. Coercion (inappropriately forcing others to believe or act).
    4. Any other unethical practices.
Persuader

The actor (person or group) striving to persuade.

Target

The actor the persuader is striving to influence.

The Methods

Here are the methods that apply to ethical persuasion.

Build genuine relationships to foster trust. (The foundation of ethical influence.) Be likable and approachable. (Facilitates relationship building.) Actively listen and empathize with the target’s perspective. (Ensures the persuasion aligns with their needs.) Communicate a compelling vision of the future that strongly motivates the target (and serves their best interests). (Provides a positive and relevant reason to act.) Transparency and Honesty: (Maintain trust and respect.) Present yourself professionally (dress well, demonstrate competence). (Establishes credibility.) Use stories to engage emotions rather than relying solely on facts (in an ethical and relevant way). (Makes the message relatable and memorable.) Avoid arguments—do not battle with those who disagree (instead, seek understanding). (Maintains respect and open communication.) Respect for Autonomy: Respect the target’s decision-making process and their choices. Invite others into a “special group” to create a sense of belonging (only if the group genuinely benefits the target). (Should be used cautiously and ethically.)

In Brief

  1. Communicate a compelling vision of the future that strongly motivates the target.

  2. Project high confidence, appearing certain in your message.

  3. Remain detached—show little concern whether the target agrees or acts.

  4. Invite others into a “special group” to create a sense of belonging.

  5. Avoid arguments—do not battle with those who disagree.

  6. Present yourself professionally (dress well, demonstrate competence).

  7. Be likable and approachable.

  8. Build genuine relationships to foster trust.

  9. Use stories to engage emotions rather than relying solely on facts.

  10. Communicating a vision of the future that is super motivating to the target.

  11. Being highly confident, basically 100% certain.

  12. Exhibiting little or no concern about whether the target acts or believes.

  13. Inviting others to be part of a special group.

  14. Not battling or arguing with others who don’t believe.

  15. Dressing nicely. Having a facade of excellence.

  16. Being nice.

  17. Building relationships.

  18. Using stories instead of fact-based presentations.

⸻

Would you like me to expand this with a list of acceptable persuasion methods inspired by these manipulators but aligned with ethical standards? 😊

Backgound

Manipulators–con (cofidence) men, frauadsters, cult leaders, corrupt politicians, and some charasmatic religious leaders—excel at persuading others. While some of their methods are unacceptable, many of them also acceptable for those who want to excel at ethical persuasion. This page, describes these method.

This page is for people who what to excel at ethical persuasion in the context of getting others to act in ways that are smart and that are in their own best interests.

Persuasion

This is the process of getting others to believe things or do things that the persuader wants them to do.

Ethical Persuasion

This is persuasion that meets the following criteria.

  1. The persuasion is aligned in the best interests of the target.

  2. The persuader avoids unacceptable methods such as

    1. Use of incorrect information.
    2. Use of biased information.
    3. Coercion (forcing others to do or believe things)
    4. Any other unacceptable methods.
Persuader

The actor (person or group) who is striving to persuade.

Target

The actor who the persuader is striving to influence.

Meanwhile, others want to skillfully persuade because they care about other. These people might be parents, teachers, managers, or leaders. However, most of these people what to ethically persuade.

Issue: What methods do that manipulator use that will also work for people who practice ethical persuasion?

what methods can I use that they use given that I want to be ethical and I want to persuade people to do things and believe things that are in their best interests??

Ethical Persuasion: Using the Tools of Con Men & Cult Leaders for Good

Great question, Donald! 🎯 You’re recognizing that con men, cult leaders, and manipulators are masters of persuasion—but their goals are selfish, deceptive, and harmful.

The key is this:

⚖️ Use powerful persuasion techniques, but align them with truth, transparency, and the genuine best interests of others.

Here’s how you can ethically adapt their methods:

⸻

  1. Build Trust and Authority (Ethos)

How They Use It: • Cult leaders project confidence, certainty, and often claim special knowledge. • Con men create an image of credibility or insider status.

Ethical Use: • Earn trust by demonstrating competence, integrity, and care. • Be transparent about what you know—and what you don’t. • Show consistency between your words and actions. • Use storytelling to humanize yourself, but avoid exaggeration.

⸻

  1. Create a Sense of Belonging

How They Use It: • Cults offer community: “You’re part of a special group.” • Con men exploit the desire to be “in the know” or part of an elite opportunity.

Ethical Use: • Foster genuine community and collaboration. • Use language like “we”, “together”, and “our shared goals”. • Help people feel connected to a worthy cause or group identity that supports their growth.

⸻

  1. Simplify the Message

How They Use It: • Manipulators offer simple answers to complex problems. • “Follow me and everything will work out.”

Ethical Use: • Communicate clearly and simply, but acknowledge complexity when needed. • Offer actionable steps without false promises. • Help people focus on what they can control.

⸻

  1. Leverage Emotion (Pathos)

How They Use It: • They trigger fear, hope, exclusivity, or urgency. • Emotional manipulation overrides critical thinking.

Ethical Use: • Inspire with positive emotions: hope, purpose, curiosity. • Use stories, metaphors, and vivid examples to engage hearts and minds. • Avoid fear-based tactics unless warning about real dangers—and offer solutions.

⸻

  1. Create Commitment & Consistency

How They Use It: • Small initial agreements lead to bigger commitments (the foot-in-the-door technique). • Cult leaders escalate commitment gradually.

Ethical Use: • Encourage people to take small, beneficial actions aligned with their values. • Help them build momentum toward goals that truly serve them. • Respect their autonomy—make it easy to opt out.

⸻

  1. Social Proof

How They Use It: • “Everyone else is doing this…” • Fake testimonials, planted followers.

Ethical Use: • Highlight real success stories and genuine endorsements. • Show that others like them have benefited. • Use social proof to empower, not pressure.

⸻

  1. Use of Repetition

How They Use It: • Constantly repeat slogans or ideas to embed beliefs.

Ethical Use: • Reinforce key truths and helpful concepts. • Repeat messages that encourage critical thinking, growth, and self-efficacy. • Avoid indoctrination—encourage questioning.

⸻

  1. Offer a Vision or Higher Purpose

How They Use It: • “We’re saving the world.” • False missions to justify control.

Ethical Use: • Present a real, meaningful vision that aligns with people’s authentic goals. • Help them see how their actions contribute to their own well-being and possibly a greater good. • Keep the focus on empowerment, not dependence on you.

⸻

🎯 Guiding Principle

Persuade by aligning influence techniques with truth, transparency, and the genuine benefit of the person you’re persuading.

If you: • Respect autonomy. • Stay honest. • Focus on their best interests (as objectively as possible). • Encourage critical thinking…

…you’ll be using powerful tools ethically.

⸻

⚡ Quick Ethical Persuasion Checklist • ✅ Is this true? • ✅ Does this respect their freedom? • ✅ Is this in their long-term best interest? • ✅ Am I being transparent about my intentions? • ✅ Would I be okay if they asked tough questions?

If yes to all, you’re persuading ethically—even if you’re using methods similar to those used by manipulators.

⸻

Wouldyou like me to draft a personal framework for ethical persuasion that you could use in your projects, leadership roles, or teaching? It could serve as a go-to guide for influencing effectively while staying true to your values!